Fictional Conversations

Kindergarten

“I’m beginning to think that everything worth knowing we learned in kindergarten.”

“How so?”

“I mean, when we were young we knew all the really important stuff. Share. Be nice to the other kids. Do the things you love. Screw the rest.”

“Not the last one so much.”

“Eh. Point is, why do we have to keep coming here, learning all the rest of this crap?”

“If I knew that, I wouldn’t have to go to high school.”

“Touché. Maybe, you know, the point of life is to regain what we knew back in the sandbox.”

“…Damien?”

“Yeah?”

“I think that’s the most profound thing you’ve ever said.”

“Thank you. It took me all morning to figure that all out.”

“How’d you even think of it?”

“There was a poster in the Character Ed room with a list of life lessons we learned in preschool.”

“Ah. That makes it slightly less impressive.”

“…I wasn’t supposed to tell you that part, was I?”

“I don’t think so.”

“Well, crap.”

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